A Life Not Worth Living

9 Pages 2275 Words

s that do care for me. They all want me to be happy, so happy all the time. This makes me sink deeper into my feeling of hopelessness. I have tried so hard to make everyone happy by ME being happy. I have on this costume that makes me appear as if I am the perfect teenager with the perfect life. On the inside I'm screaming and crying for help. I never laugh, and I never crack a grin on the inside. My thoughts are never silenced, but I am forever muted.

There have been people in my life who ­I have loved so much and been crushed at the fact that the hatred they hold for me is forever in stone. I have a sister, who I envy and adore, whom I will love for eternity, but she will never love me back. I have ruined her life by not meeting up to her standards as the perfect brother. I have a dream that one day she will return and say those three words that I have always wished to hear from her. The three words that have a slim chance of giving me life. I breathe her, I see her when my eyes are not open, and she is always in my thoughts. She holds the power to make me happy. I have never believed that one person could hold so much power to another person’s life. In this instance, she holds the power to my happiness. Although she is not the root of all my problems I feel that she has contributed to a lot of my sadness. These are words I cannot say to her because I fear if they are said she will hate !
me even more for putting so much of me, into her.

I h...